Wednesday, April 2, 2008

With this ring....

Do you take your wedding ring off? Is that a sin? Not one of the Big Ten, but a no-no in your marriage. I think it has to do with intent. I take mine off a couple of times during the day. I'll remove it when I am doing dishes and kitchen clean-up. I usually where those yellow gloves to protect my hands because I have sensitive skin, but I am in and out of the sink so much that sometimes I don't, or the gloves are sweaty on the inside and need a break from KP duty. My skin is sensitive enough that too much water/washing during the day gives me a rash of little red itchy bumps. The same kind of rash that I will get under my ring if I wear it while cleaning. My finger has even begun to smell under there like rotten kitchen sink sponge if I don't take my ring off to let it air dry. And no part of the body should smell that way. Ever. I have a beautiful ring; wide band, tension mount, platinum, and I love it. Part of my problem is that it was sized for a smaller me, the me before two kids. There isn't much room under there and if I am swelled up even a little, for any number of reasons (salt, sugar, exercise, overheating, cramps, whatever...) it gets tight. Uncomfortably tight. I had to take it off after about the 6th month of each pregnancy because I didn't want to have it or my finger cut off. And after a couple of months after the kids were born I was able to put it back on again, relieved.

I am back at the gym trying to get closer to my pre-pregnancy size. I do step classes two times a week and my hands always get puffy when I am exercising. I don't like the way the constriction feels, like my finger is choking. So I leave it in a safe place where I know I will find it again when I am ready to put it back on. Anyway, I am hoping that in a couple of weeks of proper eating and exercising that this is no longer an issue.

I don't feel different when I have my ring off. I am not free. Or searching for something. Married is married whether I am wearing my ring or not. I love my husband and want to stay married to the father of my children. And on the flip side of that, I don't think I would get married again, unless I found someone who could do their own dishes.

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